Rapid Cycles

I am watching clothes spin in rapid cycles now and I can't help but be lured into its hypnotic motion. Somehow, life's been like this. Years go by really fast and I've seen victories and defeat visit alternately. In retrospect, I can no longer tell which one I like better but certainly, each experience has taught me tons of lessons. Some, I've learned to apply. Others, I continue to ignore. It's a cycle of happy and sad, ups and downs, and successes and failures. Through it all, however, I know God's hand has been very gentle and kind. On circumstances that feel harsh, He guides with tender gestures making sure my steps go back to safety. On events that are light and happy, His still small voice become my conscience that keeps me grounded.

Still, time flies like a fleeting aircraft. On some occasions, I watch it glide swiftly in grace. Sometimes, it disappears beyond thick clouds like a bullet shot in the air never to be seen again. It leaves me feeling hoodwinked by the sudden turn of events - the speed of which makes me wonder how much has changed within a short span. And then I look at where I stand only to find myself stuck not too far from where I started and still uncertain of where I am going. I well up thinking how much chances were lost in the process and then wallows in the misfortune long enough until I get tired of self-pity. One good thing I learned about myself, however, is that everytime I fall deep, I just need to hit the bottom because in the absence of options, I get enough motivation to climb out of the sinkhole.

Then again, this grief and relief cycle of life never leaves. I realize that if we focus too much trying to comprehend its nature, it can become our waterloo, a potential final setback. Instead, what I focus now is mastering my understanding of what a cycle really is. You see, when I think about the notion "In life, sometimes you are at the top, and then, you are at the bottom", my mental drawing of it is simple. It is just upward and downward arrows, or forward and backward, progress - regress. And drawing life that way is quite exhausting, it seems that there will never really be true "progress" if it means falling back to point zero time and again. Dropping to the beginning seems limiting and uninspiring which sucks out energy from anyone.

The reason it is a cycle is because it is a journey. It is a continuous uniflow process which has no reversals. It keeps moving forward until it completes a milestone. Now each milestone does not mean we are already living perfect lives, however, the character developed in the process strengthens our grit to get to "relief" after bouncing back from "grief". The more familiar we become of this process the more resilient we are.

No reversals. When we are done with one, then we move on for a new conquest or defeat. In manufacturing, a small defect on one item does not sabotage the whole production. It will keep running because time does not relent. Defects, much like defeat, give us insights of where the weak links for improvements are. Mind you, we have deadlines to meet and a few loss must not suffer it.

No exemptions. This reality needs no spectators. You and I will have to play our part.

The clothes are all dry. I gotta start folding. There should be enough clean clothes to wear for the week ahead. And when Friday starts stomping closer, then, a new cycle will begin.

My Version of Escabeche

Sometimes in life you feel cut and wounded. 

Unsure about where to go and what to do. 

You are a fish. Caught in a world of chaos. 

Chopped, salted, and cured in garlic. 

And as if it wasn't enough, dashed also with pepper. 

Every spice -a lesson. 

The older you get, the more you season.

If you are lucky, an opportunity is cooking at the other end of the line. 

Maybe a job, a lifetime partner, a major travel, 

a dream business - each making up the coating. 

Much like a batter of cornstarch, 

maybe some additional experiences: 

salt, pepper, garlic, egg, oil/butter.

Marry both before frying.

It gets pretty hot too. Disagreements of two, 

conflicts with the boss, 

deadlines to beat, financial defeat, 

opportunities lost.

Sometimes it just feels like being fried both sides.

--- breathe -- relax ---

There will be better days. Go to the beach.

Get some tan and stay under the sun.

When it is brown and golden,

Uuuhh.. how my heart has fallen. 

Put on some entertainment.

Be patient. Don't hurry.

While the music plays, worries drift away.

Add more experience. Bring on the sauce.

Blend sweet memories

Garlic,onion and ginger minces, 'though kinda sad

will wake when bathed with vinegar and

tastier with salt and soy sauce.

Tomatoes are posh. They are like red balloons.

Vividly they fly into the blue sky.

Lay on the pile some jalapenos.

And "whoooahh".. sound that cresciendo!!

There is so much good in life. 

And so much that's more than meets the eye.

Keep exploring. Don't get stuck in a traffic. If you do, walk your way out smiling.

Who knows, even when the rain keeps pouring --

at the end of the road, life's breakthrough is waiting..

Slide in, Slide out. Tap!

It all begins with a slide, a finger, and then, thumb and pointing finger together. Sliding outwardly-- sometimes, inwardly. Could it be sensation or is it fascination? I'd like to think it is both. While I thought I was possessive, my smart phone is too. It wants my full attention. Sometimes, it robs from me time I would have used to cross off an item in my daily itinerary. And as soon as I am close to winning it back, it allies with "internet" so I lose time and my tasks increase the day after. If youtube and facebook got a little too boring, the brain-eating zombies start grunting. My smart phone wants solo attention.

I belong to the generation that lived half their life doing most things manually and in the same generation that lives to witness and experience the dawn of smart phones. We used to carry books, now i wear it. Playtime then was physical workout, now, it's all finger tapping (unless you zumba while gaming). I used to have dogs for a pet, now, fishes in the internet. Farms are huge and farming was tough but we have virtual crops growing at present. It's both awesome and sad. I applaud how inventors and business people figured "greed" and "want" (everything and anything for self) as a common denominator that generates response from all men in all walks of life. Both the poor and the rich demand more. There is barely any contentment. We are not happy with the way things are, hence, the concept of continuous improvement. Oddly, I think we may be wired to be exhaustive so we will know the meaning of having none. Experience then, is certainly the best teacher. We unintentionally go through rough times so others can avoid it. Repeat the good ones and stir away from bad examples to be wise. Repetitions of a mistake is stupidity (but aren't we -- a number of times?).

Yolo means "you only live once". That's because there is no repeating time. Even by benefit of a doubt reincarnation is true, the moment you come back to life is still not the same time in the past. Therefore, make it count. Take time to listen to others. Spend quality time with family and friends (as much as possible without the smart phones). The reason we keep running out of creativity in our conversations is because we stopped talking. Our gadgets become our easy escape. But aren't escapes nothing but a temporary detachment from reality? At some point we have got to stop running and start facing people, issues, and confronting life itself. We don't run forever or our tongues hit the ground. But when our time's up, how we spend it is what really matters. Aim for balance.

Back to the gadget. Slide in. Slide out. Tap. Tap. Tap. Nap..zzzZZZ!

"I" and "Us" of Growing

“Two's company, three's a crowd” - an American Proverb.

We hear about this statement a lot mostly referring to chaos, trouble, misunderstanding, disorganization, and division when in a group. And for most times in my life, I kinda believed the notion. Although, I can get along, just fine in a group, but I noticed, how interaction in this setup can also become much of a trouble. Decisions seem to take longer to make especially when you have more ideas and feelings to consider at a given time. Divisions in the group can also take place when certain members feel like they need to side with one who has established a certain level of dominance, while the more logical few takes as much courage they can muster to support a more rational member in the team. This is the reason why leaders are born but what if the desire to lead is inborn? And to further the thought, what if that is intrinsic to all? There are cowards, insecure, and timid types who would rather sulk in the corner and become content spectating but timidity is mostly a product of several failed leadership attempts. And although their submission and surrender seem to work in keeping the group appear united, there exists an even deeper conflict: "I, too, want to lead, but I will just be embarrassed trying." These and many more are reasons why people would rather spend doing things by themselves: "I'll travel alone.", "I'll decide by myself. Besides, I am more productive when I do not have to consult others." Keeping things in this perspective is indeed proving that the statement typed early on is true.

Lately, however, I have been hearing teachings about how community is important for people to grow into maturity. Apparently, Ecclesiastes 4:12, supports it clearly - "... A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." A group can make you stronger and it can accomplish greater things too that no man by himself can do. It can get things done faster, given that all members of the team understand the same vision and know the same purpose. Lessons to learn can come from many which could lead to accelerated growth. Proverbs 27:17 has this to say about being in the company of other people, "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." It means to say that we get to develop characters that can build us up wiser and smarter.

As good as all that information may seem, a question popped suddenly. Is this really true all the time? Why is it that in the context of our present society, implementation of proposed constitutional amendments take so much time? Why is it that street dwellers are all around the metropolis and you see the kids breathing in lung-damaging substances while they scatter to ask for alms only to hand it over to syndicate leaders? How about deterioration of self-image amidst a bullying crowd? What have we to say about Juan whose addiction to cigarettes and other vices started from peer pressure? Or Ana, the single mom who decided she'll have a baby from anyone, even without marriage, because friends, norms and research tell her that she'll have cervical cancer if she doesn't bear a child at late twenties? They weren't alone. That was community forming them too.

While searching to understand how a community with its apparent benefits really live up to rearing people to maturity, here is a scripture I stumbled on before bedtime. "For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them." (Matthew 18:20) I see this verse in the light of the phrase "...come together in my name". It signifies agreement and indicates unity among the community of three acknowledging Jesus' name as the reason of their convergence. Although far-fetched to some, I draw two important theories from this reading.

    1.) A community is effective when they work for a common vision, purpose, or objective.
    2.) A community, despite differences as individuals, must have a common identity.

In the case above, the three is a community of Christians united for a single purpose. Hence, the Lord confirms habitation.

Applying all these lessons to the early assumptions, I objectively look at community as a make or break approach towards maturity. Encamping among people of good manners develop the appropriate breeding and achieves the kind of growth you expect for yourself. On the other hand, choice of bad companions can likely corrupt good character (1 Corinthians 15:33). I do not discredit, however, the 10% possibility that it can happen otherwise where you make others change at your influence instead. It happens, not frequently though. Either way, there has to be a guiding objective or mission for it to work.

And on whether it is "I" or "us", I would say that both aren't bad ideas. To swear that growth strictly happens only in a community is quite a generalization. There are things you learn by personal study, and there are those you learn better from other people. On rate of growth, lessons learned in a community is speedy - Maybe. Like in the idea of algae competing for oxygen in a body of water, too many can also mean limited growth. Some even die so the rest can thrive. Jesus took time to pray in a quiet place by himself without disruption from others. We cannot bring community with us or let others meddle on personal matters about ourselves all the time. In the same way, we cannot always keep our happiness or sadness all by ourselves. We also have the need for sympathy, affirmation, and companionship of others.

In closing, a crowd of three, four, nor five,  isn't really bad if each member identifies to a common niche and functions for the same objective. And doing things by and for yourself at times is not sin at all. If all's done for the glory of the One who befriended us at our worst, none can go wrong.